10 Ways to Make Sure that Ego Doesn’t Hurt your Friendship
Many dictums have been said and quoted to define the place friendship holds in an individual’s life. Surely they are the part and parcel of our lives being every time we need them. I’m not going to say elaborating lines about how a friendship is since much has been already said .But this the one relation in human life that never ends .Friends never ever forget to be the silver lining among the darkest of clouds. The by default dark horse in one’s life is what are friends.
10. Stop being a nibbler
Yes, it is as simple as said. We have to be in this world for a long haul and if one always is ready with a complaint is not going to help to be friends with somebody. No one is a perfectionist and at some point or the other one has to adjust with some habits and the fun part is its not only you adjusting with the second person but he or she also does the thing. We would never be able to build new ties anybody if always we find a mistake in their personality. This practice would place our ego first and friendship second which isn’t considerable .
9. Forget things easily
Things which now matter a hell lot to us might not mean so much after a period of time so why not forget them. Even the pop sensation Paula Cole didn’t get a prom to for her senior prom. Things when held back destroy the succulence of a relation ,better to forget them and laugh at them . Because nobody is going to remember a small fight between you and your friend in back in high school. Make the things let go rather than beholding them. The more easier one forgets the more easier it is to stitch new bonds without any lacunae. Because ego is the result of bad memories or the moments still afresh in an individual’s mind which has the power to turn any one against its kiths so why not wipe the roots and leave no space for the bad things.
There has been no friendship till date where quarrels don’t exist . Two friends do fight over small things but sometimes the matter grows so huge thereby making the two fools cease talking to one another. There is no sense in taking matter too long way so that a relation is forgotten. There is always a better solution to leave the ego and forgive each other. One must not let the issues that don’t matter import a gray essence in a friendship and that too just because of ego.
7.Don’t let history repeat itself
No matter how many you find to avoid them ,some problems hit your head -on and might prove difficult to handle. And no sooner that you realise them they start growing upon you. The key to the lock is making your mistakes your teacher and don’t allow any friend to become your foe so easily. Introspect and find a way out of it . Try not to fight upon the same matter and deal with the consequences of your blunder. Keep saying – everything is going to be okay. And make yourself determine to not to repeat the same sin again . Well for a change why don’t you find another topic which is worth fighting ? (with a wink)
6. Honesty is the best policy
Telling the truth so boldly without any hesitation isn’t every body’s cup of tea. Even the thought of revealing the truth behind a situation can grow you nuts and this is the time when you so smartly find out a stress buster in the name of telling a lie . Well , it might seem easy but it hurts the following person the extent beyond one’s imagination and now the friend might reach a point of being egoistic and not willing to see your face again. So, why create a situation so irksome that even reaps the seeds of ego in a relation making it unhealthy to be further carried for. Initial lies may be the jam breaker but the initiation makes you lie more and rather make it impossible to tell the truth . And the making up of all truths will make you wish you’d have faced the truth in the first place.
5. Call timeout
It not always a child’s play to say things in a heated argument because no matter whatever you say to defend or offend the hurtful words won’t leave the mind so easily. They will always keep hanging in the air making you feel the pain. So next time you find your friendship in dilemma stop before you speak and do think about the consequences and how are they going to affect your friendship. When you feel the heat too much that it is worth destroying the friendship then let go and either agree or disagree.
When you know it is not going well between the two of you then the last thing you should do is avoid your buddy. It takes you along and increases the differences more. When two friends avoid one another then it comes to their ego which makes the situation even worse to tackle. Be confident and make yourself up to the knowledge of talking to the angry buddy . It will aid reducing the distance and heal the wounded relationship. The more you avoid more the extent of grudge strengthens . It is nearly impossible to avoid the friend who bugs you. The sole solution is not to let the ego flourish and be munificent enough to start afresh and redeem the intimacy of two friends.
3. Talk, talk, talk
Letting the anger fester can show disastrous outputs so why not use a Richter scale earlier enough to sense the magnitude of calamity. If you remain angry long enough then after some time you might not even remember why? It is not worthy to stay tense just because you caught a fight with your buddy. You would be tensed and not talk also will make the situation worst. Hence, why not talk freely like two mature individuals and sort out rather being in the stupid ego as to who must embark the conversation. Never keep the things to yourself.
2. Be a good listener
Do you listen what others say or are you all mouth and no ears? Well , if you interrupt too much or change the topic suddenly then definitely you aren’t listening ! Let the front party finish what they have got since after that you are all mouths. You owe your friend the attention and care you seek from them. It is not like always the roses will be red. To b the cherry on the cake you need to bake the cake first and that is where you should clearly listen what your friend has to say. You have to turn your other cheek and listen up! It is because only then you can learn the art of listening.
1. Choose your battles
Before fighting think twice about it whether it is worth fighting for? Is the matter so important to mortgage the friendship? If the atmosphere steams too much then keep aside your so called ego and think regarding the purpose or necessity of the battle you are on to. If it is really something you feel strongly about then give it a thought before you speak. Make the words count rather than ranting and raving all the time. Consider others point of view and try to bend ,but this doesn’t signifies that you need to give up on your belief system but hold on to the opinion of your friend and try not to start a fight . Battles are not always rather they are never the solution. The satisfaction of making your friendship blossom will make you blossom.
Never try to win over your friends because it is not the ultimate result but the journey that is fascinating. Friends are the spice of life so don’t lose them rather if they go apart the go get them.